
Greetings, extensive fanbase. Allow me to kick off my debut revue here at this jawsome blog by confessing a very personal part of myself:
I know, I know. They’re the worst of the worst, right?I just don’t understand what’s so jawsome about non-casual gamers. Actually, I don’t even know what non-casual gamers are. All that come to mind are professional game testers and that kid from the 1989 classic, The Wizard. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I’m hard-core when it comes to games with my boys Link or Mario. I do not, however, play Halo or WoW.
But I digress. The purpose of introducing myself as a casual gamer is to introduce a very special casual game I found today.
Sprout (I assume that’s his name), a tiny nut* with identity issues and delusions of grandeur, starts the game borne of a coconut and sitting on a volcanic island with a few coconut palms (including its “mother”). In the intro he asks his mom, “Hey man, what am I?”** The palm replies that Sprout’s a coconut palm. Sprout says, “Not an acorn? ’Cause I feel like an acorn.” The palm tells him there’s no possible way and directs him to the nearest oak grove, completely on the other side of the playing map.*** At that point an epiphany strikes Sprout:
erfectly oriented coconut palm hanging off the edge of the beach. A coconut falls off the tree and into the water, and we follow it as it washes up on shore of the mainland, right next to a smarmy little dandelion. The coconut becomes Sprout again, and he starts thinking, “Hey. I could be a coconut palm again if I wanted to… or I could be a dandelion like that sucker over there.” The puzzle element starts here as you choose to be any of a number of plants Sprout meets on the way, in order to help him overcome the obstacles between him and the oak grove.
A plant who can turn into different plants, each with its own ability. It’s very much like A Boy and His Blob but without the ridiculous kid and plot (but also without those jawsome jellybeans). I wouldn’t mind seeing a whole franchise of this character (or a similar one) in different settings and with different flora/fauna helping out. I mean, instead of a herbivore eating and defecating the hero, go further up the food chain, be eaten by a mouse who is then eaten and excreted by an owl! Hear that, developers? Get on this one! It’s a keeper!
For example, if the player is melting an ice cube by throwing fireballs at it, the first fireball should melt the ice a little, just to signal that repeatedly shooting fireballs will eventually melt it. Sprout, however, does nothing the first time you attempt that action. Repeating what seems ineffective is counterintuitive and annoying. Games are meant to be frustrating, not annoying. Luckily Sprout provides more than enough jawsomeness to make up for that.
Notes:
*Figuratively, yes, but I meant it literally.
**All quotes loosely translated from whatever plant-language they speak.
***Completely coincidentally.
****No sense offending the creators of Yoshi’s